The breadth of the MSc Counselling at Bangor University offered much more than exploration of psychotherapeutic theory. It enabled me to consider how I might profile myself to the outside world and prospective clients. It offered legitimacy in a field that remains difficult to navigate in terms of professional standards and ethics. Most importantly, it helped me find my own worth and develop a private practice underpinned by greater expression of my primary values. None more so than that of supporting and enabling others, while finding balance through a personal commitment to embodiment of the tools, models, and approaches I align with.
As a mature student at Bangor, I thought my self-understanding was well formed. Conversations with Professor Fay Short, and her team, encouraged me to face my perceived weaknesses and to move beyond them. I questioned my ability to conduct research, to work in online mediums, to move beyond my person-centred background. As a student on the MSc Counselling, I was able to push through these blocks, and more. I wanted to be a better therapist is all; but I think the Masters helped shape a broader person and, for that, I will be eternally grateful.
I found myself naturally drawn towards psychotherapeutic theory and practice as a Military Police Officer for two reasons. Firstly, I found the concepts of relationship building to be effective in supporting the victims of crime, especially when recording statements of those experiencing traumatic events. Secondly, it enabled greater understanding of the impacts of my own earlier life experiences and traumas. I felt then that the combination of human relating and experiential understanding opened the door to recovery, healing, and growth. A belief I still hold true.
The BBC approached me directly via my online counselling profile and asked if I would like to take part in the selection process for ‘Reunion Hotel.’ Their requirements were for a male, who practiced in North Wales, and who had a broad background in delivering psychotherapy. At the first Zoom meeting, it was clear that the production and I were a fit. Taking part in the filming was a new experience and one which offered much. Supporting contributors in telling their stories, which included terrorist attack, gender transition, and diabetes relating blindness, was an absolute privilege. Walking alongside while they faced the uncertainty of reconnecting with someone who had been significant in their lives has left with cherished memories and ongoing connections.
Watching oneself on TV is frankly quite surreal. Like hearing your own voice on a recording, with bells on. My first real view of the edited version was as it went live, and all I hoped for, personally, was that I had taken the opportunity to show the face of therapy to the public. The response I have had suggests that this was well received.
Time is the greatest variable in terms of comparison between TV counselling and private practice. Often, we would only have thirty minutes to meet, understand the story, and explore the contributor’s relatable emotional experience. I had to rely heavily on more humanistic methods of building a relationship through genuineness, empathy, and good regard. The simplicity of human connection never ceases to amaze me in terms of its power to create the environment for shared experience, and openness.
In my private practice, there is time to explore a deeper dive with clients that TV does not offer. Working in a Behavioural medium using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) as the central string to my integrative bow, I would help clients to develop tools and strategies to change the way they experience their lives to live in accordance with their own values.
Taking part in the show has crystalised my fundamental stability in delivering psychotherapy. Counselling is in my core and is something I will do for the remainder of my professional life. I also realise that taking part in a TV show, although exciting and challenging, is not what drives me. I would happily return for another season; however, there are shows with which I could not align. It is not the medium of TV that hooks, but the chance to open the door on talking therapy to others that appeals the most. My greatest professional joy will always come from sitting with another soul as they unpack their story and emotional journey.
As a field, counselling and psychotherapy offers wide variance and it is easy to become lost in the quagmire of hundreds of differing styles. I would encourage any student to remember that they are a unique person who matters, much more so than the theory, system, or service you volunteer/work with. It is easy to be lost in the latter while neglecting the former. Learn to spend time with others listening to their stories, invite others to go deeper with questions, and learn to bring your whole self to a conversation. This is where therapy is opened and formed.
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